applause crowd cheering

Me: Thank you thank you. (beat) It’s great to be here.

more cheering and applause

Me: Welcome to my Ted Talk. My name is Oba and I will be your host for the duration of the flight.

laughter

Me: As you can tell by the title of this show, we’re going to trying to find out who I am and what I am. Over time I get the feeling that I’m slowly losing myself, you know. Like I don’t really know who I am anymore. I feel like that’s enough of a back story. You’ll find out the rest if you keep tuning in, but back to today’s show. On today’s line up we have many special guests. I really hope well get to them all. Before we get started let me tell you a bit about me……

Eunice:  (walks on stage uninvited  and sits on the couch) This guy’s an over thinker to the point that he ruins his own mood.

Me: Ummmm…. you’re not supposed to come on yet. (awkwardly says to her)

Eunice: I’m aware, but I don’t care.

Me: Well maybe you should cause you’re kinda ruining the flow of my show. I mean, if you wanna take over then be my guest but if not please just stop.

Eunice: …. (awkward silence)

Me: Thanks… I guess I should introduce you to this wonderful presence. This right here is Eunice and she was supposed to tell you a bit about me cause I don’t like to talk about myself much, but now she’s just gone and spoiled the moment.

Eunice: Sorry. I was just really excited about coming out.

Me: Anyways, continue.

Eunice: Like I was saying, (turns to audience) this guy knows how to ruin a mood. Especially his own. There was this one time that Oba was complaining to me how no matter how hard he tries he feels small. I was like how do you figure? He was like cause the sun is so small in the universe, and the earth is so small compared to the sun, and I’m small compared to the earth. Then I was like, bruh.

Me: Well if you really think about it. I’m basically an atom to the whole universe.

Eunice: Stop. You’re hurting my head.

Me: Are you done?

Eunice: Yeah. Imma go now.

Me: Thanks. (to the audience) Eunice, everybody.

applause. Eunice leaves the stage area

Me: Alright the next guest we have is the wonderful…

Pragya: Me (walks onto the stage elegantly and sits with grace)

Me: (face palms) Did Eunice tell you to do that or did y’all just plan it?

Pragya: I can’t tell you that. (Smiles to the audience). Anyways, Mr. Sir right here is very random and lazy sometimes. Like for instance, right now. Why would he make people come out to talk about him if he wasn’t lazy.

Me: Could you not dis me on my Ted Talk Show, please and thanks?

Pragya: I mean he’s a kind soul and lighthearted individual…. Oh did you know he’s a good dancer? Watch.

Me: I’m not that good. Why are you doing this. (Looks off stage) Do we have time for this….. (salsa music begins to play) Wait you’re in on it too?

Pragya: Come now child.

We both get up and salsa for the audience.

audience cheers wildly

Me: Thanks Pragya. (Ashley comes out and sits on the couch) Now I think that’s all the time we have for today…

Ashley: This guy’s is really easy to talk too…… Actually he’s not. You guys may think he’s open but he’s not.

Me: What did I just say? Times up. I also said at the beginning of the show that I don’t really like talking about myself. But I do like to talk about others. Even though that’s kinda a lie.

Ashley: What do you mean?

Me: Most times I get bored with conversations and I just talk to people because it’s kind of socially expected you know. Like I don’t mind conversations but some of them are boring.

Sydney: In most conversations you’re not afraid to speak your mind.

Me: Where’d you come from?

Sydney: I’ve been here the whole time.

Me: Ooookkkkaaay… Regarding to your comment on me, I think you’re wrong.

Sydney: He’s also kinda crazy. I mean what kind of guy writes an about me in a script format. That’s a bit wacko to me.

Me: Hey, I’m trying to be creative here.

Haniyyah: Is it my turn yet? (sticks her head out from off stage)

Me: Hold on I’m not done with…… I guess I am. (looks around for Ashley and Sydney)

Haniyyah: K I’m coming out now.

Me: Do you know where they went?

Haniyyah: You should know. You made this script. Anyways…

Me: Uh could you not embarrass me please and thanks.

Haniyyah: You really like to think. You let people know enough about you to know what you value. You like to question things. Quick to fall in love with someone deeply.

Me: It’s called heavy infatuation. And no I don’t.

Haniyyah: It is? And yeah … you do.

Me: No I just made it up. Well if I do why would you tell the whole world?

Haniyyah: Cause it’s true.

Me: (say to the off stage crew) Show the baby picture.

 

Me: That’s all the time we have for today tune in next week when we don’t talk about me.

 

*Audience is on their feet cheering wildly.*

 

*Everyone comes on stage and bows*